About Taz

I grew up enjoying soap operas…with their over-the-top drama, love stories, divas, and unrealistic plot twists!

Seriously, y’all, where else but in a soap opera could you lose your job...find out it was because your reputation was trashed by your supposed best friend, now nemesis...and while driving home from the office; you find out your husband betrayed you with your “best friend”…then…wait for it…

Because you are distracted, you get into a car accident…and wake up with total amnesia…not remembering your husband or your crazy life?!

Oh! The soap opera love stories were even better!! I envisioned living happily ever after with my one true love…life would be just PERFECT…Every Day!

Looking back, I realized I loved soap operas because they were an escape for me...

For the first 45+ years of my life, I lived with low self-esteem, depression, anxiety, and PTSD. I felt insecure, introverted, perfectionistic, sad, lonely…and suffered years of suicide ideation!

Turns out, I was living my own drama filled soap opera!

Growing up, my parents dealt with a lot of stressors and poor communication early in their marriage. While they did the best they could at the time; unhealthy and generational family dynamics led me to take on A LOT of limiting beliefs and negative thoughts.

I thought I wasn’t GOOD ENOUGH…SMART ENOUGH…or PRETTY ENOUGH. I was INSECURE about my body.

I thought I had to be a “GOOD KID” to keep the peace in the family. Which meant being PERFECT, and NO MISTAKES, otherwise I wasn’t WORTHY OF LOVE.

To make things worse, I grew up with untreated PTSD, due a childhood trauma, that I repressed until my late 20s; which made me forget much of my childhood. The trauma and negative beliefs fueled a need to seek external validation and try to please others.

Added to the mix was growing up in a military family (along with my own ~25 year career)…I MOVED OVER 23x TIMES in my life! Instead of a jet-setting, soap opera kinda life, starting over in a new place every couple of years made me feel like an outsider. I protected myself from “what if they reject me” fears by becoming more introverted…which made it harder to make friends.

While I am proud of my military service and did well; I experienced continued trauma patterns through exposure to combat and not processing the loss of life I witnessed.

Hmmm, ever notice that soap opera characters tended to bounce back from their repeated dramas and traumas a lot faster (and easier) than we do?!

While I tried not to show it, I didn’t bounce back easily. I felt I constantly had to prove myself. I ALWAYS noticed what I failed to do and compared myself to others. The Perfectionism and Insecurity took a toll, mentally, physically, and emotionally. It led to cycles of burn out, unhealthy selfcare, and excessive weight gain.

Given my past, my relationships tended to be with EMOTIONALLY UNAVAILABLE MEN. I was afraid to be me, so I would try to mold myself to their likes and desires. I had unrealistic expectations of what a relationship should be like (i.e. a soap opera leading man would sweep me off my feet). However, they had their own unresolved issues and were not able to meet my expectations.

Repeating these unhealthy relationship patterns (i.e. poor boundaries and communication, and unrealistic expectations) fueled my negative self-image, need to try to be perfect, and attempts to fix them (and the relationship), AT MY EXPENSE!

While I had benefited from counseling at different times in my life; I fell back into my unhealthy patterns because they were familiar.

Have you ever felt like you couldn’t escape the drama of your life, or tried to bury the pain…and still REPEATED THE SAME MISTAKES?!

Soap operas are known for the dramatic plot twists. Similarly in my life, 6 years ago I experienced some MAJOR life changes and drama:

• Retired from the military (HUGE transition! The sense of culture, identity, and camaraderie was suddenly gone!)

• Moved across the country and purchased our first home.

• Accepted a new job without a break.

• Challenges in my 2nd marriage continued to grow.

• Unresolved grief and loss over infertility and never having kids.

• Years of endometriosis and cyst pain and 2 precancerous growth incidents.

• Full hysterectomy included the horrors of menopause symptoms, overnight!

• Continued stress eating and was considered borderline obese.

• Resigned from my job after 1.5 years, due to stress and it not being the right fit.

• The final soap opera plot twist…after over 19 years of marriage, my husband asked for a divorce!...I DIDN’T SEE THAT COMING!

If I am honest, part of me was relieved. I wanted the pain and loneliness to stop; but I didn’t want to be the one to ask for the divorce. If I stayed (or waited for him to leave me) I could also reinforce my “I am not loveable” mantra my inner critic constantly repeated!

So here I was…twice divorced...starting over at forty-nine (personally and professionally). I was jobless, stressed, overwhelmed, depressed; and masked my pain by eating and drinking too much.

I fully bought into my depressed and suicide ideational thoughts (and the worst my inner critic had to spew). I told myself (on numerous occasions) if I were to JUST DIE…IT WOULDN’T MATTER…because I DIDN’T MATTER!!

At the lowest point in my life, I felt so sorry for myself and wondered what I was going to do. At that moment, I recalled a promise I made to my parents (depression runs in the family and they have been impacted by others’ suicides).

I promised I would never put them through the grief and unanswered questions people experience after someone’s suicide. So, I asked myself, did I really want to spend the rest of my life, depressed, anxious, battered by life, and constantly repeating the same drama!?

Like a scene in a soap opera, where the doctor saves a crashing patient with a defibrillator…that one powerful question brought me back to life!

The instant response to the question (from somewhere deep inside me), was like 1,000 volts needed to jump start my heart and brain and shouted, “HELL NO!!”

Now what?? I loved being of service and helping others...but I had lost my confidence. I knew from my mental health pre-licensure experience, and working with clients, that I loved reading self-help and personal growth books. So, I started re-reading…and read…and reapplied what I learned to my own life!

While reading, I came across a shocking statistic: We have over 60,000 thoughts a day! 95% are repetitive, and 80% of our repeated thoughts are NEGATIVE!!

WTFO (What the F*ck Over)!! It dawned on me I’d spent the majority of my adult life constantly replaying my dramas, listening to, and believing, my inner critic!

Another soap opera scene unfolded in my mind...everyone was at a posh outdoor party…I entered (dressed to the nines), and the music suddenly stopped! Everyone looked at me to see if I was going to cause a scene...

YEP! That statistic made me realize I was continually reacting to life, instead of taking control of my life!! Internally, I felt this sense of utter calm and crystal clarity. I decided right then and there, “NO F*CK’N MORE!!”…which I shouted out loud…and scared the dogs!

So I started working on 3 areas in my life: PASSION (love of self, others, and service in the community), PURPOSE (my calling/why), and PLAY (energy, gratitude, and hope in life). Within these areas, I focused on my mindset, mindfulness, gratitude, forgiveness, selfcare, and self-acceptance.

I learned how much our MINDSET can shift to see the positive, possibilities, and drive our future intentions. Developed a practice of MINDFULNESS, to become aware of my limiting beliefs and negative thoughts. Practiced GRATITUDE, noting the good in my life and for who I was. I also practiced SELFCARE via a more active lifestyle, meditation, ate healthier, and ACCEPTED MYSELF. I am in genuine alignment with who I am.

I learned to focus on the daily process, celebrate the wins along the way, neutrally notice what needed work, and take consistent, small, action steps forward, in order to create the life I’ve always wanted.

I FORGAVE MYSELF, for all the years stuck in those negative patterns. Lastly, I built up my SUPPORT SYSTEM, reached out for help, and continued on my healing journey.

Yes, I had challenges. There will be stumbles and setbacks; however, I am no longer afraid of making mis-takes! Instead, I am curious and treat them as just an integral part of my successes.

I invested in myself and rediscovered MY PURPOSE as an Emotional Freedom Techniques Master Practitioner and Certified Life Coach! I am now doing what lights me up, serving, and paying it forward, every day! Because of my transformation, I AM ON A MISSION TO HELP OTHERS KNOW THEY ARE NOT ALONE!

I specialize in helping others resolve PTSD/trauma, anxiety, depression, and/or blocks holding them back. You can take your life back, regardless of the trauma, stress, anxiety, depression, or obstacles they face. You can be the hero in your story and create a joyFULL, peaceFULL, and soulFULL life!

I no longer dream of a handsome soap opera leading man to sweep me off my feet, because I AM THE HERO OF MY OWN HAPPY ENDING!

If you are struggling, please reach out for support. There are so many resources available. If my story resonated with you, and/or you are ready to discover what lights you up inside…to create the life you have always wanted…reach out…I’d genuinely love to hear from you!!